The other day, like every day, I went to the office restroom to do my business. If you’re like me I pray on the way that I will have the entire place to myself. Eighty percent of the time I usually am, but it’s that twenty percent that is filled with hilarity.

How many times have you guys walked, wanting to drop a dookie, seen the stall in use and proceeded to wash your hands like you came in to do that? So as to let the unknown person in the stall, who doesn’t know it’s you, know you didnt come in for a dump. Sitting on the can enjoying a good dump and someone walks in and you have to halt proceedings. And you can’t even let a peep out, as the restrooms have such beautiful acoustics. And no communication whatsoever is allowed. This entails no eye contact, speaking to fellow patrons or using a cellphone. Granted, a nod or grunt of acknowledgement is acceptable, BUT no eye contact!

I still have no idea what the protocol is in the women’s restroom and anyway that place is still a mystery to me. But for all us men, the trip to the little boy’s room is always an adventure that ends with either satisfaction or horrible embarrassment.

In case you have been breaking some of the rules or have no idea you have been, here’s a video to learn from.