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District 9: For Humans Only

I was speaking to a bunch of friends last night and none of them had heard of District 9. That was not the answer I was looking for, considering I didn’t know what the frack it was either. Until now.

Produced by Peter Jackson, District 9 is the directorial debut of Jackson’s protege and South African born Neill Blomkamp. In this mysterious sci-fi flick, it seems that Johannesburg, South Africa has become a haven for refugees, both human and extraterrestrial.

Shot in a faux-documentary style, District 9 is slated for release August 14th, 2009. Check out the uncensored trailer below or watch it in HD at Apple.com.

From the teaser, I assume that the big-ass alien ship has run out of petrol and can’t leave the earth, so it begs the question – why would the visitors from outer space be forced to live in a shantytown when they could stay aboard their ship? There must be more to this and I’m very interested to find out.

The official website d-9.com with its media-rich interface allows you to either enter the human side or non-human side and provides a lot of information, most of which I don’t understand or know what to do with. I chose the non-human side and entered an obviously false alien ID. Alarm bells started ringing, things were scanned, I was told my connection was being monitored, and got redirected to some company called Multi-National United. The plot thickens…

[via Digital Citizen]

Read Dracula in real time

Binder of beautiful and elegant books, Whitney Sorrow, is posting each entry of Jonathan Harker’s diary (the diary entries make up the Bram Stoker novel Dracula) on her blog on the actual days that the entries are written. She started on the 3rd of May which is Jonathan’s first entry. However, I’m a bit slow on the uptake and only found it today.

It’s a pretty cool way to experience this epistolary novel whether you’ve read it before or not, as you get to experience the action at the same time as the characters do. Read your daily instalment at Dracula but I warn you, one entry a day just makes you want more!

Caption Contest: Win Vida Coffee Vouchers!

Note: This competition has ended.

It’s competition time at Onelargeprawn and we’re hosting another caption contest. It’s winner-takes-all and the funniest caption will win 25 coffee card vouchers to use at the purveyor of most excellent coffee,  vida e caffé.

Our contest image is taken from Daniela Edburg’s Drop Dead Gorgeous series. You can see more of Daniela’s amazing work at http://danielaedburg.net.

Leave your caption in the comments section – one caption per comment, but you can submit as many comments as you like. Remember to provide a valid e-mail address as that is the one we’ll be using to contact the winner. This competition starts today and will end on May 13th, 2009. It is only open to South African residents.

Much love to Peta at Obrigado and vida e caffé for sponsoring the prize. Muito obrigado! ;-)

Top 10 Comebacks of all Time

I am the comeback king. I lie, I’m completely rubbish. Upon being insulted my modus operandi usually involves a terse “You suck donkey balls” followed by a tight pirouette and quick sprint in the opposite direction. My sense of fight vs flight is highly tuned ;-)

Other people have settled conflicts with a retort so stabbing there is no recovery; their arguers lose face and must retreat wondering why the fuck they didn’t think of it first. One such person is the ever lovable Winston Churchill and these are some of his comebacks.

Nancy and the Poisoned Coffee

Nancy Astor, an American socialite who married into the wealthy English family of Astor, was invited to a dinner party on the Churchill estate. She became extremely annoyed at the drunk Churchill and said, “Winston, if you were my husband, I’d put poison in your coffee.” To which Churchill merely replied:

Nancy, if you were my wife I’d drink it.

Let Sleeping Dragons lie

Churchill was listening to a long-winded speech by one of his opponents and after 30 minutes, he slumped into his seat and closed his eyes. His opponent noticed and shouted, “Must you fall asleep when I am speaking?”. Without even opening his eyes, Churchill quipped:

No, it’s purely voluntary.

The Ugly Truth

Churchill was intoxicated at party in London, and when another irritated lady yelled at him, “Winston, you’re drunk!” his retorted with this:

You’re right Bessie, and you’re ugly. But tomorrow morning, I’ll be sober.

Winston Churchill’s witty comebacks are included in the top 10 comebacks of all time – see the full list at TopTenz.net. If you’ve made a memorable comeback, drop us a comment.

Puke in my Mouth: The Ladies Response to Jizz in my Pants

Some time back we posted about jizzing in our pants and now it’s time for the female response to the famous parody. Check it out.

Big ups to the girls puking in their mouths! The lyrics are after the jump.

Read more

Meat Boy Brings Retro Goodness, Hitler Gets a Mention Too

From Jonathan Mcentee and Edmund McMillen comes an old-school platformer with loads of meaty goodness. In Meat Boy, you and the girlfriend Band-Aid Girl are having a good time when she gets kidnapped by some blob-type thing. You need to get her back but in your way stands a series of dastardly jumping puzzles. With blocky graphics, a catchy soundtrack, and ever challenging (yet addictive) puzzles, it makes for some great retro fun.

Play Meat Boy at Newgrounds.

The cute little fleshbag will be making a transition to the Nintendo Wii as a WiiWare title; Super Meat Boy is slated for release later this year. They seem to have got the ball rolling with some potentially offensive advertising that takes a dig at vegetarians and Hitler in the same breath.

The dubious text has since been edited out on the game developer’s blog. Keep updated with the game’s progress at Super Meat Boy.

[via Gamers With Jobs | Joystiq]

40 Rad Skateboard Designs

I fell off a skateboard once, and that about wraps up my experience with the culture that is so firmly established in today’s society. Aside from skateboard-inspired furniture, I do like looking at the art that goes onto this awesome board with wheels connected to it.

Smashing Magazine goes through 40 amazing skateboard designs. Here are three of my favourites:

IMAKETHINGS

IMAKETHINGS aka Andrew Groves, is an illustrator, artist, maker of small things and creator of beasts. These are 5 of his handpainted decks.

Calavera Bodega

Great comic-book influenced designs from Calavera Bodega.

Electrik Suicide

Unique mixed-media designs from Electrik Suicide.

More at Smashing Magazine.

Be the Dominant Species with Phage Wars

To beat a parasite you need to think like a parasite, and in Phage Wars you need to spread yourself like a communicable disease. Send out your parasites and infect other cells to slowly build up your genetic payload. Once you’ve cleared the level of rival pathogens, you will become the “Dominant Species”.

When you start the game, you’ll need to choose one of 8 species to play with. Each species comes with their own level of strength, speed, and agility so choose wisely. The number in each cell indicates the amount of living organisms contained in that cell and if you want your species to claim it, you must beat that number by sending parasites from your own cell to that cell.

Go forth and multiply – play Phage Wars at Armor Games. Let us know how you fared.

Dancing Chihuahua Dances, People Cry Cruelty

It’s dance party time, and Ernesto the Chihuahua (not real name) is feeling feisty. Someone took this video of his awesome dance moves. YouTubers are crying animal cruelty so you better watch it before it gets flagged as such and promptly removed.

Sure the little guy is tied up to an entertainment centre, but they probably eat Chihuahuas where he lives so those happy feet are the very thing keeping him from becoming a dipping snack at a Sunday barbecue.

[via Urlesque]

Pick the Perp

I love the smell of gender and racial stereotyping in the morning. Pick the Perp is a cool time waster where you need to use your inner-prejudice to correctly guess which person was charged for the crime shown based on their mugshot.  For some people it’s just like looking at a family photo album.

Test your profiling skills at Pick the Perp. I correctly matched 6 perps in 20 lineups (30%). Let us know how you did.

[via Trend Hunter]