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Sleeping Around is Sleeping Around

Politics requires some higher brain functions and a relatively good grasp of the English language. Some people would say this person has much of these qualities as a paraplegic has use of their legs.

Listen as Floyd Shivambu, spokesperson for the ANC Youth League tries to explain his concept of sleeping around to 702 Talk Radio DJ, Redi Direko.

Lol. Pwned! Read the full transcript at Blatant.co.za.

[Thanks Lucy | Colourful word graphic by Wordle]

A Brief History of Weed

Doobie, dope, roach, reefer, grass, Mary Jane, boom, splif, ganja, herb. Whatever it’s called, Marijuana has become a facet of people’s lives as far back as the 3rd millennium BC. And this fun 2-minute infographic takes a look at marijuana through the ages. Check it out below or watch it in high quality at YouTube.

It’s a clever promo for Showtime’s hit TV series Weeds that returns for its fifth season come June 8th.

[via Blame It On The Voices]

BONUS: Sultry actress Mary Louise Parker regrets doing topless bathtub scene in Weeds’ season four finale.  Story and pics at The Superficial [NSFW].

BONUS #2: 40 creative infographics can be found at Six Revisions.

Competition Reminder: Win Watchmen Graphic Novel!

Just a quick reminder that there is only a week left to go before our fantastic Watchmen competition comes to an end so if you haven’t done so yet, this is a good time to submit your entry. Courtesy of local comic book emporium Outer Limits, one luck winner will walk away with the hardcover edition of one of the most influential graphic novels of all time, WATCHMEN!

To enter the draw, name one of the Outer Limits staff choice graphic novels for the month of may. The full competition details are available HERE. Good luck!

Sherlock Holmes, I Presume?

I like Guy Ritchie, he’s made some stonking flicks. Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch are two of my favourite; Swept Away, on the other hand was one film I wish I had never seen, kinda like that red rash on my testicles. In any case, Mr Ritchie seems to be back on wining ways with his reinvention of the enigmatic English detective, Sherlock Holmes.

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle would have been happy to see on-and-off drug addict Robert Downey Jr playing the pipe-smoking character and nanny-bonking Jude Law playing Holmes’ assistant, Dr Watson. Check out the trailer below or go to Trailer Addict.

I was expecting a dour mystery set in the foggy alleyways of London, but this seems as action-filled as any James Bond flick. I suppose it shouldn’t be surprising considering Holmes is a masterful singlestick player, boxer, and swordsman. The movie is due out in December 2009.

[via Pop Crunch]

Our Dumb World

Mostly the peeps over at The Onion have the same dark, cynical, and often down right depressing view of our world that I do. Although sometimes, even I, the devil’s handmaiden find their stories a little too on the bitter side and they remind me of that awful stuff my gran used to put on my nails to stop me biting them when I was little.

Yesterday however I found their amusing Our Dumb World Atlas of the Planet Earth, and it rocks. They’ve added their Our Dumb World layer to Google Earth. It features little onion icons, that when clicked on, pop up country profiles and other interesting cultural, political and historical facts. Well I don’t know if I should actually call them facts, as most of them are made up – anyway they’re funny go check it out.

germany

japan

Dear Bicycle Thief

We’ve had two cars stolen from outside our house – it was a traumatic, rage-inducing experience on both occasions, with swear words aplenty and wishes that the robbers suffer through a back-street vasectomy performed by a blind epileptic with AIDS.

Other people, however, take a more calm approach when robbed. This person, for example, wrote a sympathetic note to the robber saying:

Dear bike thief, I am very sorry that circumstances in your life led you to need to steal my bike. I hope that it helped you to get your life back on track. Good luck. Love, a friend.

To which the robber replied:

Thanks, chap! Don’t worry – doing fine, the bike is terrific, hello from me mates,

Later, bicycle thief.

Now that’s just mean. My note to a bicycle thief might just be something like the letter Barbara wrote after a douchebag stole her Schwinn. How would your note be worded? Let us know.

[via Buzzfeed]

This Sex Toy Could Mangle Your Privates!

What the hell is this? If you thought it was a medieval siege weapon, or something used to hunt whales, you’d be sorely mistaken.

This contraption is called The Plow and is classified as a premiere fucking machine according to its website [NSFW – porn].

Priced in the $500 to S750 range, The Plow is being marketed to people who need a sex machine that won’t break the bank (but it may break your privates). It features a quiet motor, stroke adjustability, and is powder coated in gloss black for beauty. It comes with the standard attachment system but optional dildos can be purchased.

This machine is so smooth, quiet and easy to use it allows you to focus more on your pleasure and less on your mechanical abilities.

Read more about 17 more disturbing sex toys at Cracked.com [NSFW].

[via Asylum]

Lookie What we Have Here: Bas Rutten Teaches Self Defense

Bas Rutten knows a thing or two about fighting. This Dutch-American mixed martial artist was at one time the UFC Heavyweight Champion and finished his career on a 22 fight unbeaten streak. He also happens to a certified MTBN Thai Boxing instructor, a 5th degree black belt in Kyokushin karate and a 2nd degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do.

In this video he teaches some self defense lessons with his colourful way of expressing things. Lookie look what we have here – SMACK his face! Rutten is a man who doesn’t do an eye for an eye, he believes in TWO eyes for an eye! :fighterm:

Yes he is fucking nuts and totally my new idol. As Edmund Blackadder would put it, “He’s mad! He’s mad. He’s madder than Mad Jack McMad, the winner of this year’s Mr Madman competition.”

[via The Chive]

A Day in the Life Told in Logos

During a typical day we interact with countless brands. Many of us might not notice these interactions, but I certainly am made aware of them when I rock up to the traffic lights in my rattletrap hooptie and idle next to a Porsche Boxter. I wipe the tears off with my Woolworths tie, flip another Marlboro into my mouth, and get out of my car. I stroll over to the driver, casually knock on the window, and as it rolls down, I politely ask him/her for their Patek Philippe watch, Armani sunglasses, and Macbook lest I shoot them dead. Bravado turns to disappointment as they usually laugh and drive away, mentioning how funny and well-spoken vagrants are becoming these days. But I digress…

A woman named Jane decided to chronicle the interactions she has with different brands during a typical Friday from the time she got up to the time she went to bed. See it below.

What would your brand timeline look like? Drop us a comment and let us know.

[via Geekologie]

Around the World With Señor Coconut

Every day at work I suffer fools, or is it atrophy? The words escape me for the moment. That’s because I’ve got tropical lounge beats knocking around in my head. The Chile-based Uwe Schmidt, or Señor Coconut, marries merengue and mambo rhythms with dead serious electronic music. I suppose you could call it electrolatino music.

Check out his cover of Daft Punk’s Around the World.

The single is taken off the album Around the World with Señor Coconut.

[via Andy’s Blog]