Gaming News Lists

2017 Q1 Gaming Release Calendar

We know you wonderful folk love your video games, and it is good to know when things are going to hit our shores (Ed: You mean ‘good to know when our wallets will be periodically drained of life’). Our awesome distributors have kindly provided us with a list of what games and accessories hit the stores at what dates in the first quarter of this year. Since we will be updating this page as we receive new information, we recommend you keep this page bookmarked. We will also be linking to our reviews within this page, where we have published them. Bam! Double the excellence, just like that.

Awesomeness Creepy Lists Movies Video Clips

Creepy October: 10 Movies not to Watch Alone

Part of the ritual of growing up is watching horror movies together as a group of teenagers. The shared experience mitigates the fright somewhat, and makes it more tolerable. Some of those films you can even watch when you’re alone. And then there are some films that you really shouldn’t watch when you’re alone. Especially if you’re of a nervous bent. In which case, why are you watching scary movies alone, again? Get the popcorn, and I’ll run down some creepy films you have to rope others into watching with you (in no particular order–randomness can be just as creepy as the expected scares). Obviously, fright is a subjective term; some might find this list a little tame, others a “keep away” notice. If you’ve seen these, or have other recommendations, let us know in the comments below! The list after the jump-scare.

Entertainment Lists

Winners Weekend: The 2009 SA Blog Awards

I’ve have been nursing a massive hangover resulting from the drinks party held at our place last night. It’s the marching band in my head all traded their musical instruments in for flippin’ jack hammers. Those uncouth bastards. But I digress.

The winners of the 2009 SA Blog Awards were announced last night and posted on the website this morning and in case you missed it here are the results:

Congratulations to all the winners, especially to the pimptastic for scoring six awards! There is no “i” in team but there is in win ;)

Lists Movies

10 Movies Where Cars Were the Stars

There are some movies where car power outshines the pitiful human element. In some instances the vehicle was a vital component to cover up the head-up-ass acting (yes you, Vin Diesel in The Fast and Furious).

Unreality breaks down 10 films where the actors were completely overshadowed by the autos they drove. Vroom vroom.

Entertainment Lists Video Clips

LOL Moments: Whose Line is it Anyway?

“Whose Line Is It?” is unquestionably one of the funniest shows I’ve seen. With the ever-talented improvisers Drew, Ryan, Colin, and Wayne, Whose Line is jam packed with with LOL moments. Here are a couple of those moments:

Question Only – International Flight

Sound Effects – Tarzan and Jane

World’s Worst – Things to Say on a Romantic Date

Hollywood Director – Robin Williams

Living Scenery – Richard Simmons

See the full 15 funniest Whose Line moments at Unreality.

Cautionary Tales Lists

The Greatest Valentine’s Day Diseases

“You really shouldn’t have. No really, you shouldn’t have.”

Here is five gifts you really shouldn’t give or receive this Valentine’s Day (or any day really). There are no pictures to complement this post – there’s no way I’m searching Google Images for genital warts

1. Gonorrhoea

Also known as the clap, from the French word “clapier” meaning “brothel.” The bacterium Neisseria Gonorrhea infects the male urethra and the female cervix, but can also exist in moist places like the back of the throat, the rectum, and the eyes. The symptoms include burning on urination, frequent urination, yellowish vaginal discharge, redness of the genitals, swelling of the genitals, and a burning or itching of the vaginal area.

2. Syphilis

The Treponema Pallidum is a microscopic worm-like, spiral-shaped organism that burrows into the moist mucous membranes of the mouth or genitals. There are three stages of Syphilis which causes anything from ulcers to hair loss, fever, skin rashes, lesions, and possibly damage of the internal organs and the brain. Incidentally Syphilis is also called the French Disease.

4. Chlamydia

Similar to Gonorrhoea, Chlamydia is found in the cervix and urethra and can also live in the throat or rectum. It is highly destructive to the fallopian tubes and can cause infertility and tubal pregnancies. In men it can cause inflammation of the urethra and rectum. Chlamydia often goes undetected.

5. Pubic Lice

Also known as crabs, these parasitic insects are found in the genital area on pubic hair, and can be spread through sexual intercourse or contact with an infested person’s clothes or linen. It may occasionally be found on legs hairs, armpits, mustaches, beards, eyebrows, and eyelashes. Lice found on the head are not pubic lice; they are head lice.

6. Herpes

Herpes simplex virus 1 and 2 (HSV-1 and HSV-2) are members of the herpes virus family, Herpesviridae, which cause infections in humans. HSV-1 auses cold sores and fever blisters in the mouth and around it and HSV-2 causes sores in the genital area. The lesions will heal but the infection is persistent and symptoms may recur periodically.


HIV stands for Human Immunodeficiency Virus and has now spread to every country in the world. It is one of a group of viruses known as retroviruses. After getting into the body, the virus kills or damages cells of the body’s immune system and progressively destroys the body’s ability to fight infections and certain cancers. Infection with HIV occurs by the transfer of blood, semen, vaginal fluid, pre-ejaculate, or breast milk.

– via Holy Taco , eMedicineHealth, Wikipedia.

Lists Mindlessness

Offbeat Valentine’s Gifts

Valentine’s Day, once a tribute to a Roman Catholic martyr, has been perverted by florists and candy companies. That’s my excuse for not buying the missus anything on February 14th. It’s worked in the past, and I’m sticking to it.

Fun fact: Did you know that until 1969, the Catholic Church formally recognized eleven Valentine’s Days?

If you’re one of the unlucky millions that have to buy something, here are a couple of non-traditional gift ideas:

Heart Butcher Knives

Created by Bloodbath McGrath comes personalized heart butcher knives. For those moments when a severed heart reminds you of your lover.

Edible Candy G-String and Bra

A great way to end a Valentine’s Day meal, the Edible Candy G-String and Bra contains 30 fruit-flavored candy pieces, and has just 60 calories. Great if you’re watching your weight and if don’t care about the hygiene issues that may arise from eating sweets out your lover’s vajayjay.

8-Bit Dynamic Life Shirt

The idea behind the 8-Bit Dynamic Life Shirt is that you wear one and you give one to your lover. When you both are in range, the pixelated hearts start glowing to full charge. The hearts will dip to two and a half when you both are out of range. Geeky, but cute nonetheless.

World’s Largest Inflatable Heart

Nothing says “I Love You” more than with an outrageously large inflatable heart.

Click out to Oddee for more unusual Valentine’s gifts.

Cautionary Tales Lists

The 30 Greatest Conspiracy Theories

It’s in our nature to question the happenings around us. Why just the other day, I was questioning the ethics of the Simba chip company for piping more air into their chip packets than actual chips. I’m sure it’s a conspiracy, and I’d stop buying Simba chips if my bodily functions didn’t depend on them. In any case, from the Pearl Harbour bombings, to JFK’s assassination, to the NASA moon landing, every major event our of our time has a conspiracy theory attached to it.

Join the Telegraph as their examine the 30 greatest conspiracies. It’s in two parts – PART 1 | PART 2 – via Look At This.

Lists Mindlessness

Desert Island Hotties: The Top 10 “LOST” Babes

Being stuck on a deserted island without hot chicks is like going to the strip club and finding out all the dancers are your cousins. It’s also like buying Penthouse Magazine to actually read the articles. Thankfully LOST provides some great eye candy to go along with the obtuse storyline.

Join Manofest as he counts down the Top 10 LOST babes of all time.

I don’t completely agree with this list. A noticeable omission is Elizabeth Mitchell (Juliet) who happens to be my favourite because she radiates kindness and warmth wherever she goes.

Let us know who your top LOST hottie is.

Cartoons & Comics Lists Weirdness

Bringing the Pain: Terrible Torture Instruments

I can safely say the only reason I don’t use torture devices today is because I’m not the all-conquering, merciless king I was in my past life. But if I were to get my lofty stature back, I’d stock my playroom with the most horrifying torture devices, you know, for parties or for storing the occasional uninvited guest.

Heretic’s Fork

One end of this forked device was pushed under the chin of the victim, the other into the sternum; the strap secured the torture tool to the neck. In somewhat of a pained state, the victim would have to say the Latin word “Abiuro” (I recant), lest they were hanged or burned at the stake.


This vice was used to crush fingers, toes, knees, and elbows. Simple and efficient – two words that should always be in a torturer’s vocabulary.

Lead Sprinkler

We have ways of making you talk. This device was filled with either molten lead, tar, boiling oil, or boiling water. The said contents were then dripped onto the stomach, back, and other body parts of the unfortunate victim.

More of my favourite terrifying torture devices lay in wait after the jump.