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Tag: pain

Key & Peele: Dubstep

News of the upcoming Skrillex tour of South Africa reminded me of the comedy sketch duo “Key & Peele”, specifically of an episode where they took on the subject of much mockery: dubstep.

The two men are packing up Key’s apartment and Peele’s suggests that they put on some dubstep to make things go a little faster. Key has no idea what dubstep is and Peele is happy to educate him. And so starts their descent into madness. It’s sweaty, bloody, and all too hilarious. Check out Key & Peele: Dubstep below.

[via @arteechoke]

The Best Bails and Fails of 2011

The human race is capable of a great many things. Failing is certainly one of them, and thanks to the collective efforts of TwisterNederland8, you can now see a glorious 12-minute compilation of the best bails, fails, and blood trails from the year gone by.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QQ19A2GFaBM

[via @6000]

April Fail

I have been at work for only 10 minutes and am already exhibiting all the signs of extreme grumpiness. Only the misfortunes of others will help to lighten my mood, and thankfully the month of April has been good for that kind of thing. Courtesy of TwisterNederland, here is a collection of bails and fails from the month of April.

[via College Humor]

All Aboard the FAIL Train

It’s a new month and some people like to reflect on how their lives panned out in the preceding 30 days. YouTube user TwisterNederland is one such person, except he concentrates on things that other people have not done so well. This is his compilation of bails and fails for the month of March.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nwVUSM5HHcg

That was hilarious. Thank you, Internet. In case you missed the fail compilations for January and February, you can find them after the jump.

Read more

Bails and Fails

So it appears I am the only person in my department at work today. I thought of messing up their work areas but given their high intelligence quotients, I doubt they would believe that an errant rock rabbit broke into the building and went to the toilet on all of their desks. Thus, I am relegated to scrawling the lyrics to Celine Dion’s “All By Myself” on my whiteboard and watching silly people fall down and hurt themselves. Today I find solace in their pain.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KDg7CiHAPqg

It may not have been an entertaining as the compilation of freerunning fails but I found that cathartic. How about you?

[via TwisterNederland]

Beautiful Sand Animation by Kseniya Simonova

The words, they escape me. To describe Kseniya Simonova’s art as amazing is an understatement. Simonova won this year’s Ukraine’s Got Talent! show with a dramatic and beautiful sand animation that tells the story of her nation’s painful history during World War II. Her emotionally-charged piece moved the audience to tears.

Unfortunately I can’t understand the symbolism nor the lyrics to the music, but it certainly moved me in other ways. Have a look for yourself.

The 24-year old sand animator from Evpatoria has used her $1,000,000 Ukraninan Hryvnia prize to buy a house and to set up a children’s charity.

[Thanks for the tip, easy]

Forever Fail: Misspelled Tattoos

I like tattoos and I’d be covered in them if I didn’t like the pain that comes with getting one done. Then again, pain is part of the ritual I’m told. I have a minimal tolerance to any type of pain and thus tend to admire other peoples’ tattoos.

Whilst some tattoos can be absolutely awesome – Lucy Furr has a detailed one of the goddess Lakshmi on her back – others can be downright hideous and a permanent reminder of the mistake that was made. And nothing says forever FAIL quite like a misspelled tattoo ;-)

More misspelled tattoo goodness at Oddee.

BONUS: If you missed it, check out an earlier post on Russian Tattoo Fail.

Woman Bites off Lover’s Penis in Car Crash

Oh sweet baby Jesus! This the true pain that comes from a romantic tryst gone wrong.

Metro.co.uk reports that an adulterous boss and his secretary were having an affair in a car in a Singapore park when their good times was cut short, so to speak, by a reversing van. The 30-year old secretary was performing fellatio on her boss and the impact of the crash caused her to bite her lover’s penis off!

It that’s not humiliating enough, this whole incident was observed by a private detective who had been sent by the woman’s husband. The detective said that the car ‘shook violently’, was then hit by the van, and a woman screamed loudly, with her mouth covered in blood. No word on whether the chomped love muscle survived the accident.

BONUS: Improve your car-sex technique with the Ca’a’sutra. It’s not in english, but the photos are self-explanatory. Oh and cartoon sex may be NSFW at some workplaces.

Bringing the Pain: Terrible Torture Instruments

I can safely say the only reason I don’t use torture devices today is because I’m not the all-conquering, merciless king I was in my past life. But if I were to get my lofty stature back, I’d stock my playroom with the most horrifying torture devices, you know, for parties or for storing the occasional uninvited guest.

Heretic’s Fork

One end of this forked device was pushed under the chin of the victim, the other into the sternum; the strap secured the torture tool to the neck. In somewhat of a pained state, the victim would have to say the Latin word “Abiuro” (I recant), lest they were hanged or burned at the stake.

Thumbscrew

This vice was used to crush fingers, toes, knees, and elbows. Simple and efficient – two words that should always be in a torturer’s vocabulary.

Lead Sprinkler

We have ways of making you talk. This device was filled with either molten lead, tar, boiling oil, or boiling water. The said contents were then dripped onto the stomach, back, and other body parts of the unfortunate victim.

More of my favourite terrifying torture devices lay in wait after the jump. Read more